when i was beautiful

WHEN I WAS BEAUTIFUL


The emptiness that comes
When the dawn rises
Medicines cannot master

Once I was beautiful
Did the dawn rise in your eyes?
How I taught my soul to flicker
Now I cannot tie it down
My self as it ricochets off the ceiling
You never fully caught me
So I would lay crying in your arms

Once I was beautiful
And learned the night could hold more than the day
While you lay sleeping I planned my death
And dreamed of all the different ways to die

While you lay sleeping
I realized I could never be a mother
Even though I had said I would give you a child
Because I know what my mother was to me

For the emptiness that comes
When the dawn rises
And the tears that flow as easily as condensation
While you lay sleeping
And I lay flickering
When I was beautiful